Need Prayer

I haven't posted anything lately. First I was too busy, and now I'm sick. I would truly appreciate your prayers!

Yesterday I had a MUGA heart scan done. They injected me with some radioactive molecule and then put me in a gamma machine to watch how my blood flows through my body. Anyone who reads this blog knows that I'm super claustrophobic! I was truly terrified, but as soon as I was strapped into this machine complete peace rushed over me! I knew that I was not alone... God was right there with me! It's kind of funny to think about. I mean, there was absolutely no room for anyone else in that gamma machine. But yet the Almighty was in there with me! Makes me think of that old song, "How big is God? How big and wide his vast domain! To try to tell these lips can only start. He's big enough to rule His mighty universe, yet small enough to live within my heart!" I had an awesome time just talking with Him! I'm ashamed to say that I haven't been spending enough time with Him lately. It was almost like He was telling me, "Okay, if you won't come to Me, I'll come to you!"

I have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow. I'm nervous, but I plan on using the time in that tube to talk with Him again.

All of these tests are leading up to my new MS therapy. Unfortunately, the only approved one that I haven't tried is chemotherapy. Now that's a word that truly terrifies me! The goal is to kill off the white blood cells so that they stop attacking my brain.

Did I tell you that my MS specialist thinks that I'm "complicated"? I found that hilarious when she e-mailed it to me! I mean, the woman is brilliant but she has absolutely no bedside manner! But when it comes to MS, I'll take brilliance over the bedside manner any day! She felt I was complicating things because I told her, after searching for weeks, that there was not an oncologist anywhere in my area willing to take orders from her and prescribe chemotherapy for me. I knew when she told me to find one that I wouldn't be able to. I mean, were living in the "let's sue every doctor we possibly can for everything we possibly can" era, and she wanted me to find one in small town USA that was willing to do something that they are unfamiliar with just because she said so! Oncologists don't prescribe chemotherapy for MS! She just doesn't understand what it's like to live in a rural area because she's always lived in cities.

I do hope to start posting more. We went on vacation last month and had so much fun! I have some great stories to tell you. Of course, that's assuming anyone still reads this blog that was seemingly abandoned!

I'm really tired so I think I'll go rest for a while.

Until next time!
Stacey